Together Again

As you can tell from my last few post we are moving, this has happened very quickly and I must admit I still find myself wondering if it's really real?

So far we have rid the house of boxes and bag of old clothes, created an enormous sell pile which will be the fuel of our garage sale on Sunday, started cleaning to get the house ready for some buyers (hopefully) and painted!

I must admit I am truly amazed that the hubby and I have completed this list  and the funny thing  is you would think that this would be the time where we would be ready to jump on each others case. For example last night at 10:30 pm I went up to check the progress of painting (I would have painted but with Asthma and a cold not the best idea) to discover that he used the wrong blue. The blue he used was the one in the babies room not the grown up one I had in the garage. I said "that's the wrong blue it's in the garage" and he followed it by "really...oh that sucks" I went down and got the new paint and by 11:30 the room had the right blue.

Now those who know us know that a few weeks a go this would have led to a huge argument with words being thrown around and eventually hurt feelings and a half painted wall. But it amazes me that by making the hard choice (selling the house) that we have re-kindled our friendship and the commitment to our family. Yes it could be the that we have made the smart choices which we both know will let go of some of the pressure but I really feel that by making this choice that we have re-discovered what attracted us to each other in the first place and that would be our commitment to each other and to our dreams. The fact that we would do anything for each other or our family!

So for the man I love and laugh with, not only are you my best freind your are my soul mate. And even though you drive me crazy and laugh at my blog I want to tell you that six years ago we stood before god our family and friends and we promised we would love each other for better or worse...well we haven't exactly seen the worse but we have seen some bad and definitely some better. And it makes me think that I  couldn't imagine a better person to travel this journey with!

Things are in Motion

Well we've done it our little home will be on the market as of Saturday May 1st! First thought Whew! Is that  a light at the end of the tunnel! I was saying to hubby it took so much to get the house; the year and a half to build it moving in sleeping on a blow up mattress while saving for a bed, 4 months of trying to conceive our first little monsters, then the "surprise" of the 2nd lil monster. But I can't help but wonder what the next chapter will hold for us. Yes we have both shared some tears over this decision but now we are looking onwards and upwards.

I must say with the real estate agent we have chosen I feel we are in very good hands, it's amazing how just by having the right people surrounding you, it can make you feel completely empowered. Says a lot about big decisions and about life if you surround yourself with people who truly have your best interest at heart how can you go wrong?

So now it begins we have a ton of "stuff" to go through because with this fresh start we are de-cluttering all that is going to weigh us down. But with the friends and family we have how can we even think that we are in this alone!

PS the shower on Saturday I totally did not go...I thought about it  a few times however I instead played with the Lil Monsters and boy was it fun!

Change is in the Air!

Well, we have been making a few decisions overnight. We are thinking of selling the house to get a leg up and move back in with the in-laws (SCARY I KNOW!) however I'm very torn in one way this idea seems very smart and if we take advantage of it we can save like crazy and get a bigger house with more space and no noisy neighbours attached to the wall, and possible a room for a baby #3 (which is a discussion we will have in 2 years time!). However I can't help but think if this is the way we we go it seems like we failed.

Since contacting a real estate agent my hands are shaking. Logically I know this is the best idea for my family however how do explain that to my emotions? As I sit here and write this how do I tell the tears that are forming in my eyes that it's okay, to leave the house where both the lil mosters were born and had there first steps at? How will we explain to the Lil monster that we are leaving and someone else will be living there? When that's where there lives began

When we bought the house we knew it was a for now home and I guess as we grow so should the house. Duhhh that's why it's called a starter home! But there are so many emotions linked to the house. Will it ever be the same even in the next house? Is this really our best option? Have we failed?

Going to the chapel???

So I find some of my greatest thought about life are coming to me through my Lil monsters... The biggest Monster has this thing where all she has talked about for the last few weeks is that she is going to marry her little friend. She told me on the way home from work yesterday that I should ask him the next time I see him. Now this Little friend is super cute and I must admire her for her taste! He is the son of our dearest friends so he would be a good match. However we just finished potty training so I think we are not even close to being ready for a wedding! LOL

 I know having 2 girls it will be inevitable that one day soon boys will be calling our house.  I cried during Mama Mia when she's getting her daughter ready for the wedding (I have watched it 6 times and cry every time). I always say to my hubby what happens when we here those words "but I love him mommy" So here's the plan I'm going to stop at the store on the way home and buy some pretty stationary and write both my darling Lil  Monsters  2 letters. First letter is for them on there 18th birthday (In hubby's culture this is a HUGE event and milestone but at the same time where I live that's the age when you head off to College or University way too young for my liking) and the other one will be for when they decide to get Married (Pre-school weddings don't count :) )

This kinda feels a little morbid makes me think I'm kinda preparing for if I'm not around however I have so many dreams and aspirations that I would love to be able to look back when we reach these great milestones and remember what they we're like when they we're babies and the dreams that I had for them.  And hey maybe if I write them down now maybe I might pass on some valuable life lesson that they might find useful!

This week I got an invite to an old "friends" wedding who I really don't know if she is still a friend, I really haven't seen her on a personal level for years. Years ago she was a big part of my life however I don't know if she even knows my life. Does she know my kids..nope she knows that they exist. Does she know my father had open heart surgery or that my mother had a stroke...nope. So why do I feel the overwhelming need to hang on to her. Does the fact that I don't have the huge group of girlfriends make me feel like I'm missing something...yeah a little but I have one very wonderful Best Friend who I would trust my life with and who has been there through thick and thin! And recently I have been discovering that I do have a lot of people in my life that are friends that I have a fear of putting the label of friend to.

The invite was followed by a very weird call from another "friend" who's first sentence mentioned that she was at work, and made it seem that I was interrupting her work day anywho... the call was for a shower that was for this coming Saturday. This girl was also once a "really" good friend of mine who was hurt that she was not chosen to be my maid of honor who I haven't spoken to since my wedding in 2004 so I figured I would call back and say yes I will try and make it email me the directions... and it took a day and a half to get a reply. Am I hurt...kinda... but not really I kinda think that I'm in the "well I guess I have to invite her" list anyways. I did tell her that I was going to bring one of the Lil Monsters with me as my excuse as a way out early or more likely for someone to talk to. Which was acknowledged by "I don't mind if you bring your kid".This leads me to think that a re-connection may not be in our future, and really why do I torture myself!

So I have decided TIME TO LET GO!!! Yes I never did the all girl trip to Cancun however I'm going to arrange an all girls trip to dinner and a movie in the next 2 weeks! Yeah it would be nice to go somewhere hot and tropical however most of my friends that are important in my life and who are most importantly worthy of spending my time with (away from the always growing Lil Monsters) have Lil Monsters of there own (yes the furry ones count!)

Just wondering what you will do to connect with the ones that matter the most?


PS As I finished writing/ranting about this I checked out a very special girls blog that is singing the same tune! I promise I looked at it after I finished the rant all I can say is great minds think alike!! But it really makes me think we all have our struggles and hopes for very good friends in our lives!

Hello

Okay so I have never done this before, and I must admit that I was totally influenced by the movie Julie & Julia! Loved it!

Since I have turned Thirty I have hit a few huge milestones;
House- Check lovely 3 bedroom town house
Babies- Yep did that one twice (one was a surprise)
Hubby- Still got him although this always seems like a work in progress (someone told me that this is normal for a young family)

However when I think about it I really must say "What do you mean I'm in my thirties" in my Twenties I always thought I would be much further then I am now...Why do I feel that something is missing? Is something missing? Why can't I just enjoy where I am?

So I'm going to spend the next few years trying to figure it all out. I know, I know maybe we'll never know it all maybe we just have to enjoy the ride. If that's the case I'll keep you posted. As it happens you'll read about it!

Stay Tuned...Like Jennifer Garner in 13 going on 30..."I'm thirty, Flirty and Fabulous!" well with 2 kids 3 and under maybe not so Flirty!